I Am Brian Wilson: A Memoir by Brian Wilson With Ben Greenman -- (Book Review)

I Am Brian Wilson: A Memoir
By Brian Wilson with Ben Greenman
Published by Da Capo, 2016
Print: $26.99
Ebook:$13.99

When I was growing up I was always aware of the Beach Boys but didn't really understand their history. I didn't even know Brian Wilson was in the group! I only saw the Mike Love led version of the group which was occasionally joined on drums by the fabulous John Stamos. Of course I knew all the hits like "California Girls" and "Surfer Girl" from the radio but never really sought out their records. That changed about the same time as I became a hardcore Beatles fan. When I heard that the biggest influence on Sgt. Peppers was the Beach Boys album Pet Sounds, I bought the record soon thereafter and loved it! Many years later I'm in about the same spot. I have their greatest hits and Pet Sounds but haven't really made an effort to learn about their other music. After reading this memoir, I don't feel that this is going to change.

Despite what Mike Love says, Brian Wilson IS the main musical force behind the Beach Boys. He wrote all their best music. Mike Love was more of the leader in their live incarnation, even though he did help with lyrics here and there. Throughout the memoir are song lyrics and I have to admit, I skipped over most of those. Beach Boy lyrics are exactly inspiring and deep.
Brian Wilson could challenge the Beatles musically, but he was never in the same ballpark lyrically.

I would say the main turning point of his life when he was young was a flight he got on to Houston way back in 1964. The Beach Boys were kicking butt on the music charts and they were poised to do an American version of a Beatles world takeover. But for some reason, Brian did not want to get on the flight. He told everyone he didn't want to get on. I think the pressure and whirlwind nature of being a rock star just wasn't a good match for Brian's demeanor and psyche. He just liked to write songs and sing. He was never into performance in front of large groups of people. He got on the plane even though he knew he shouldn't and promptly proceeded to have a psychabilly freakout. Brian was just never the same after that point. He stopped touring with the band and instead focused on songwriting. His move preceeded the Beatles own abandonment of the road 2 years later.

From that point on, he started to suffer from mental illness which was further exacerbated by the use of drugs and alcohol.  After he tried LSD, he started to hear voices that would tell him he was no good and that they were going to kill him! He still hears those voices to this day but chooses to ignore them.

He had a "doctor" named Dr. Landy who was supposed to help him get his life back together in the 1970s, and at first he seemed to actually be helping. As the years went by though,  Dr. Landy used Brian's fame and fortune to enrich himself. Brian couldn't stand up to him because the good doctor kept him well medicated. It took the involvement of his future wife Melinda to support him and believe in him enough to give him the strength to cast aside this evil influence on his life. Once the doc was out of the way and his relationship with Melinda blossomed, Brian's life took an upward swing for the first time in two decades and has remained on that upward tilt.

If you're looking for a day by day, blow by blow (they did get in some fist fights with each other) account of the Beach Boys, this isn't the book for you. It's more of a stream of consciousness exercise by Brian with no regards to time or place. In one sentence, he will be talking about the creation of the Pet Sounds album and then in the next he will be talking about a hamburger joint he likes in LA or watching Wheel of Fortune on TV. While the chapters have a broad theme, chronological order quickly goes out the window. That would be ok if Brian was as good a writer as Bob Dylan or Patti Smith, but he's not. Like I said before, his gift is melody, not words. This makes the memoir a pededstrian read in terms of style and craft, even with the help of writer Bob Greenman.

To me, the most interesting and heartfelt moments in the book were when Brian wrote about his mental illness and his relationship with his dad, Murray. I couldn't believe it when he revealed that he actually served a plate of his own feces on a plate to his dad. Of course, he got punched out for that. He got punched a LOT. When he would try to tell his dad about his mental illness, his dad would just say he was a "pussy" and to get over it. Yeah, that's his exact word. But Brian acknowledges that his dad gave him the drive and ambition to make the Beach Boys work. Although, his treatment of his son was also the main reason why he was such a psychic mess.

Within the bigger narrative of his life, Brian returns over and over to his "chair" in his house where his main activity seems to be sitting and watching TV and watching the goings on of his wife and adopted children. He still seems to be a bit odd and emotionally removed from the world and his family but I guess it works for him. I remember an article in the past year or so where Jeff Beck was invited to the studio to work with Brian and Brian never spoke a word to him. If he hadn't had musical success with the Beach Boys and made lots of money, I could very easily picture Brian as a homeless person living on the street. Frankly, I admire the dude a lot for how much he accomplished in his life despite having a horrible father and suffering from depression and other mental issues.

My Grade: C